I am just amazed at myself. I am handling things so much better than I thought. I keep waiting to freak out, but I think I am just ready.
Mostly, I am just worried about you. I can't imagine what you are going through. And hearing your voice tonight on the phone just broke my heart. I hate it when you are hurting and I can do nothing. I want to tell you about Trevan and what he is doing but at the same time I know that is hard for you to hear. I just don't know what to say or do.
So, I will say all that I know. I LOVE YOU...you are my world, and even though you don't like me to say it you are our hero.
ON A LIGHTER NOTE...I am loving my squirrel feeder. Nutty is getting fat. And it's so funny watching them all...I am such a nerd.
Trevan picked up the stuffed doll of you I got him and laughed and starting head-butting it. Then he hugged it. I cried, tried to catch it again on video but he of course wouldn't do it. He loves you...and he misses you. There is a giant hole in our home...
Well....I gotta get some sleep. Here is the ribbon I made that random people are posting all over myspace...
Jason people besides just me and Trevan are thinking of you. SO many people, people you don't even know. You have so much love and support. And you are stronger than you know...when you feel down, just know I am there with you. Lean on me, I can take it...I think God gave me some kind of super strength so that I can help you and Trevan right now...
You are my world...and I wish you were here. I started crying in walmart today cause the last time i was there it was with you....and then I immediately started laughing because I am such a drama queen and I was picturing what you would say if you saw me standing in the cereal aisle looking like a lost puppy with tears streaming down my face. Even from Georgia, you can make me laugh. It's one of the reasons i married you :)
well goodnight honey...i hope you get some rest.
TF
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